Every month I post an update on my “life” journey, more of an evolution, since turning 30. This Easter Sunday at Christ City Church, the sermon really resonated with me and I wanted to share with my readers. No, no…it is not PREACHY… I am just introducing a real, personal, human struggle that could actually resonate with anyone in any faith or belief. Oh and… I have sprinkled in some family Easter pictures, which if I am to be honest, have nothing to do with my writing! The pictures do help to make the seriousness of my post a little lighter! So, here it goes….
I have noticed the older I get, especially around holidays, that I seem to have lost the feeling of excitement in life. You know, the excitement that you get as a child for Santa or the Easter Bunny. The excitement of your whole life ahead of you with endless possibilities, “the world is my oyster” kind of thing, or simply the excitement of an evening tub soak with bath fizzies and my favorite show. As the years have gone by, I feel like I have lost “me”. A sickening feeling because with the dying out of my excitement, so goes the light that I used to harness in my heart.
When I was young, I was willing to put myself out there to freely grasp for what I wanted, but years worth of experiences in being hopeful and then being let down have lead me to try to avoid hope all together, causing me to lower my expectations in life and in those around me. I have found myself constantly trying to be more realistic with my expectations and goals to avoid failure and hurt. I have realized that my hope has begun to fade and I have become interested but not invested in life.
After listening to Robin Abedi’s sermon at Christ City Church on Easter Sunday, I was enlightened and challenged to further my growth in faith by allowing myself to dream and hope like I once did as a child. “Fear prevents real relationships, so commit and be full of hope so that you go for it all and create. Hope is instilled within us. Turning off hope is like saying that I am done with humanity.” – Robin Abedi
Hope motivates us for greatness! It is not learned, but resides in all of us. If we allow it to take prescience it will position us for success. As I say these things, I feel excitement within but the second part is having faith in hope.
“The Christian meaning of hope is that no matter how bad it is or gets you will overcome. If you are Christian, you know this as truth in your heart. It gives you an irresistible desire for more of life.” -Abedi
If I am to embrace this reality I will need to have faith in my hope and give up comfort and control, a huge fear of mine. Control is the one thing I fight so hard to maintain. Through my journey, I am learning how to use transparency to offset control.
If I am transparent in my relationships and business dealings with my disappointments, happiness, expectations and boundaries, I can put a process in place in efforts to avoid the loss of control. The growth in this area of my life has been crucial for my development in deciding what types of relationships that I willing to participate in and which ones I am willing to let go of. Gone are the days of being monotone and middle of the line with my feelings. Giving up comfort and contral to means getting back conviction and courage. I have the courage to be me, to express my feelings, to commune with others in REAL relationships, to dream, to have HOPE.
Journey Through My 30’s:
Step 1: TRANSPARENCY (CHECK!)
Step 2: Embracing Hope through Faith (in process)
Thank you so much for reading! I would love to hear more about your ideas on hope and faith. Please feel free to leave them in the comments below!